On the Other Hand….(new title!)

It came today. The resolution letter. (See my post "Faxing Away A Year's Worth of Tears  http://halfdozengirls.blogspot.com/2009_09_01_archive.html) I knew it would because of the conversation I had with Anthem several days ago inquiring as to whether they got my latest addendum to the grievance. One more bump along the way. There were so many bumps along the way, including the initial denial of the grievance. Lots of phone calls, yet another letter, and so much time spent on the phone. Was it worth it? I suppose so. It wasn't lost on me, however, that I got this letter on the last day of 2009. Perhaps it's symbolic of being done with the old things in the past year and starting 2010 off with a fresh, new, hopeful start. I was surprised at how I felt as I first scanned the letter. Fear. I felt a wave of fear wind my stomach up in a tight knot. Wow , I thought, this is real . All the words are in black and white. And then, "All of your concerns you shared have ...

     Been to see your dentist lately?  Ever thought about the fact that we're held captive as we're reclining in that fabulous vinyl, hydraulically -operated chair with the little plastic-lined drool pad attached to us with little clips around our neck? Let's not forget the bright light shining in our face as the dentist skillfully utilizes each and every little sharp-pointed, stainless steel tool (does she have to use ALL of them?!) and of course, the water drill. Bzzzzz! Bzzzz! Are you feeling the water spraying sensations and loud drill sounds in your ear right now? Sorry, don't mean to bring back bad memories. Anyway, yesterday's appointment was a little more "captivating" than usual.      My dentist, thankfully, is very sweet. She relishes talking about recipes and food.  I'm quite grateful, too, because she will frequently offer yogurt or lychee fruit to my kids if she hears them say, "I'm hungry!" And, of course, they're A...

Perhaps you got an idea of what my darling husband is like by his culinary, uh, efforts , in the kitchen. Wait till you hear about the gifts he's lavished on me over the years! I got to thinking about Tim's gift giving style after we came back from Target 2 Saturday's ago. As the Christmas season began I thought about how much I love buying gifts and do all the gift buying (you'll soon realize why), but that Tim is kind of left out of the whole thing.He's never minded, but I didn't want to be selfish. So, we're at Target on Saturday evening after a dinner date and I point out a couple of things I had in mind for the girls. He responds: "I can get that at a yard sale!" "Tim!" I say rather shocked at the idea of going to yard sales for Christmas presents. It's actually not a bad idea, and Tim has really scored at yard sales in the past. It just didn't sound right to me. We head down the Wii game aisle. "I know the girl...

Crazy, huh? Starting a new diet on December 1st? Think about it. It's the perfect time to start a new diet. (This has nothing to do with Tim's unappetizing cooking, either. He isn't really allowed near the stove with a pan.) I give myself Saturday as a "free day" because I can bear the deprivation and salads and fruit and nonfat yogurt and counting calories knowing that on Saturday I can go to Bean Town and blissfully consume an orange chocolate chip scone. On Saturday nights Tim and I go out on a hot date (well, maybe not too hot - it is colder these days...)and I usually pick at what he orders (hopefully something with fries!)  while enjoying endless refills of Diet Coke. It's heavenly. Not only do I have some alone time with my handsome husband and some meaningful adult conversation, we usually go to some tasty place. We love Island's, Claim Jumper, Cheesecake Factory, the new Stonefire Grill, and of, course, the Corner Bakery. With my family we usua...

 Yum!Yum! Good eats! Frosted Flake Chicken A La Tim Need a new recipe for the holidays? Want to try a little something new and, uh, unusual ? Have I got a recipe for you! Here it is:  Ingredients: 1 "adventurous" and hungry husband 2 packages of skinless, boneless and defrosting chicken thighs that were a really, really good deal and waiting to be tried in a new tasty Apricot Chicken recipe later that week 1 cup of crushed Frosted Flakes 1/2 cup milk 1/2 cup flour 1 glass baking dish that is ungreased so that you have to spend an inordinate amount of time getting the chicken unstuck from it after you throw out the hard, crusty, vomit-looking inedible coating from it Directions:  Step 1: Go to Ikea with Daisy at around 5:00 pm on a Saturday evening and leave no provisions for dinner; no leftovers and nothing already prepared. Step 2: Don't call home with any practical, LOGICAL suggestions for dinner or suggest picking something up while en route home from said...

Thanksgiving was fun this year - kind of. We had a small crowd, Tim and our six girls, and my sister Ann and her boyfriend, David. Later, Holly and her girls, Madeline and Olivia, came by and visited for awhile. The food was tasty, nothing burned (too badly, that is), and everyone was in a pleasant mood. And then...later at around 3:00 a.m. I hear Julia coughing and crying in her crib. I went to check on her and -ugh-she had barfed orange, pumpkin pie vomit all over herself and her crib. So, I proceed to clean her up and put new sheets on her bed. Thankfully, Tim helped me. So, I lay back in bed weary and tired from having cooked 90% of our Thanksgiving meal all by myself (a first for me and I was pleased with how everything turned out, mostly). I heard it again - coughing and crying and when I checked on Julia again she had thrown up more pumpkin vomit. Ewww...So, I decided to lay with her on my chest on the couch and try to catch her vomit with a chucks pad wrapped around her chest...

A couple of mornings ago I awoke on my own at 5 am. I listened for a couple of seconds and then I heard... Nothing Ahhh...the sounds of quiet. You might think that because I'm quite a talker and rather loud (it's a Hollcraft trait -we're all LOUD!), that I must like a lot of noise. No. I  love quiet and solitude. Perhaps it's because I get so little of it. But at 5 am it was so quiet - no traffic sounds in my neighborhood or yard equipment whirring and buzzing, no dishwasher or washing machine shaking and rattling, no sprinklers twinkling water around, and mostly, no people noises. Not even Tim softly snoring, breathing loudly, or mumbling about chemistry assignments (Tim really never leaves his work entirely at school!). It was glorious. I thought about this period of silence I was enjoying. I began to think about people who had needs that I knew of and prayed for them. I told God that I was all His today and that He could use me in anyway He wanted. I knew tha...

Well, at least I can admit it! I got a speeding ticket about two weeks ago. I was in a rush to get home in the morning to start school with the girls. When the officer pulled me over I said, "I know I was speeding. I need to be home in three minutes. Can you make this quick?" Four minutes later, I was on my way heading east on Sierra Madre Blvd. towards Michillinda to go home.Ugh. I still haven't gotten the official ticket to know how much it's going to cost. It'll be expensive. I haven't told Tim yet. Another ugh.      My biggest problem is that I drive too fast. My neighbor told me several months ago to slow down because of all the kids that play in our street. He was right. I'm trying, but sometimes I forget. While driving home on Grandview St., a lady stopped at a stop sign motioned for me to slow down. She was right, too. All these admonishments are warnings for me to slow down. I feel rather embarrassed when I'm corrected because I know they...

With this title you may be wondering, Huh ? Librarians don't sing! They check my books out, help me find books, tell me how much my overdue fines are, tell my kids to stop running around the library while screaming and jumping on furniture- Oh, wait, those are my kids, not yours. So, anyway, just to clarify, as part of their official job description, librarians DO NOT sing to the library patrons. Unless...they're doing kiddie story time! Ah hah! you think .  This makes sense now! Laura has a bazillion kids and she probably takes them to library story time because it's free childcare for a blessed 25 minutes or so while she aimlessly wanders the library aisles looking for exciting, informative, engaging reading material. Well...yes and no. I do take them to Pajama Story time at the sweet, little adorable Hastings Branch Library. (Although, I have been accosted by a nose-hating, strange woman there before. See my post last year "I Bet You Cry About Your Nose" ...

     Since you left 19 years ago, you know I haven't talked to you or written to you directly much. It's kind of creepy to me in some ways. I really believe that you're in Heaven with Jesus and my little babies (perhaps my boys!) that never made it into the world. I just feel more comfortable talking to God as opposed to you. I was thinking, though, that the anniversary of your death is in a couple of weeks and I wanted to write you this letter. So much has changed with me since you were last here. I'm sure you know that, though.   I was 20 when you died, a young woman. I'm now almost 40 - a middle-aged woman with a husband and six daughters. Can you imagine that? I remember you once saying to me, "I hope you have 10 girls just like you!" Well, I got 60% of the way there! But they're not all like me. Elena, my oldest, resembles me in some ways. She's very serious and studious, kind of like I was. She's also very hardworking (when she wants t...

This morning at 7:45 am Chloe and I were in my bedroom folding the clothes on my bed. We had an exchange that went something like this: Chloe: "Mom, I have the hiccups." Me:  "You do? I have a remedy for that." Chloe:  "Really?" Me "Yes. I've been trained and certified in getting rid of hiccups in children. You want me to try my remedy on you? (Earnest nod from Chloe.)All right, well payment will be due when services are rendered. You know, the payment is a big hug and a smoochie kiss.Can you pay that? (Another vigorous nod from Chloe). Come here then." Chloe walks over to where I'm standing. I bend down and put my arm behind her knees and another arm around her waist and turn her upside down. I begin to shake her up and down while gently pressing on her tummy with one hand and pressing my fingers into her ribs with my other hand. She starts laughing and squirming. Me:"You can't laugh! No laughing! The cure won't work! ...

It's Sunday morning and I'm at my computer looking over old blog posts. I'm dressed for church and really want to go, but Julia has been sick and is napping right now. I wanted to take her to church and at least enjoy worship - even if it means chasing her around the back of the church. I can't bear the thought of waking her up, though. I was up with her for about an hour and a half last night. She seems to have left ear pain and I fear it's an ear infection. I'm going to have to get her into the ENT this week if she doesn't seem better. She's been up A LOT this week. Many nights I've gone to her 4 or 5 times to try and settle her. I think what's making things worse is that she doesn't always get her antihistamine at night like she should. If I go out at night Tim might forget it or I forget to give it to her. Sometimes I have a hard time remembering everything I should. Oh well. This week I'm starting the "Felicity" b...

So, I did it. I wrestled with the decision for about two weeks. I cried over it, mulled it over in my mind, pondered several applicable Scriptures, and, of course, talked to and prayed with several trusted friends about the issue. I even mentioned it to my pastor and he prayed for me. We discussed it at Care Group. Was I trusting God by taking this possible course of action? Was I trusting God to issue His justice, as opposed to me circumventing His plan? Was this act stemming from bitterness I was holding onto? And on and on and on I wrestled.Then, I thought of different ways to accomplish a similar purpose, all to no avail. Several friends, by the grace of God, were very direct and helpful to me. Thank you. You know who you are. Finally, I had to sit down, pen and paper in hand, and just do it. Hours and hours later at my computer, probably a whole ink cartridge and a hundred sheets of paper later, it was done. An eleven page document, a "masterpiece" if you will. I poured...

So, I had a couple of minutes after finishing school this morning and I got to thinking about my trip to the Bonaventure the other day. Sarah and I and 8 kids (I know - I'll never take them all there again!) went to the revolving lounge at the Bonaventure at around 5:30 on Friday afternoon. As we were leaving I was waiting for the hostess to bring me my stroller. All 10 of us are waiting by the hostess podium-thing and we see two young, fresh-faced couples dressed to the nines walking down the stairs toward us. They check in with the hostess and I noticed one of the young men in particular. How could I not? He was tall, young, blondish and handsome. What I really noticed, though, was his bright white dazzling sports coat with matching pants and white dress shirt. The material was beautiful. It was shiny satin white stripes on white cotton material. (I loved textured clothing! Especially white dress shirts that have textures - very classy!). I looked over at his date who was young a...

(Isn't this baby so precious? I love newborns!)I just finished my second week of homeschooling and I haven't given up yet (despite a 4th bout of head lice in 9 months. Ugh...)Is there a medal out there for me? I am just kidding. It's actually gone very well. The girls and I are on a productive cleaning schedule and our morning school schedule yields finished assignments and plenty of instruction and learning, although I'm always needing to tweak it here and there. So far, I'm very pleased with how things are going. My mornings are VERY busy and I'm usually disciplined at not answering the phone, which typically throws me off.(I love to talk! But then, you knew that...) The mid-afternoons tend to vary a bit, but everyone has a quiet time and I'll either run errands or lay down myself for a nap. Ahhh...naps...sleep. What's that?!?! Seriously, though, when I lay down at the end of the night for sleep I feel extremely gratified at the industrious day I...

So, I should be asleep right now. No, Julia did not wake me up. I just woke up after being asleep for a couple of hours and couldn't get back to sleep. My mind and emotions started to turn over and wander. So, here I am. I started homeschooling all the girls this week and am working out the kinks in my schedule. I think it's going really well and I'm enjoying being with all of them. One challenge I'm having is my little gypsy - Daisy - is at it again. Apparently, when she was supposed to be in bed she snuck into her older sisters' room and stole Camille's journal and 3 purses the girls had. The girls were beside themselves when they had discovered it later that night. I had been out visiting with Tim's family earlier this evening, so I didn't catch the crime in process. I told the girls that they needed to TRY to understand that Daisy is 3 and that this is what 3 year olds do. It really is a difficult age and so destructive. Stereos, car DVD's, seatb...

So, where was I before my crazy vacation? Oh yes, my current change of heart. On the last day of school for Chloe, who finished kindergarten, and Leanne, who finished2nd grade, I looked back at the school as the girls got into the car and I said "goodbye." I had felt that I was done with that school, at least for the next year. I had an inexplicable desire to homeschool the girls. Chloe was looking at being retained for kindergarten, which neither Tim nor I was thrilled about. Leanne had had just a so-so year. I realized how difficult it had been to have two in public school while having two being homeschooled and in a co-op at church. I was in two different worlds and I couldn't give myself to either world. I didn't really commit myself to anything and it was depressing to me. When I was pregnant with Julia school was good for Leanne and Chloe because both were helped in ways that I couldn't provide. And when Julia was a newborn I was so distraught and traumatize...

Remember when you returned to school in September with your starchy, new clothes and stiff, shiny shoes on the First Day of School? For me, Marengo Elementary was my grade school in South Pasadena and I still remember the paper-y smell of the classrooms and the humid, hot feeling in the air. My first assignment was always to write a sentence, paragraph, or essay (depending on what grade I was in) about what I did during my summer break. My essay was always filled with much of the same: my adventures in Mammoth Lakes. All summer long we lived in our condo in Mammoth and waterskiied, fished, went horse back riding, inner-tubed down the Owens River (SO FUN!),visited Bodie the ghost town, and hung out at the Rec room, jacuzzi, and pool area with various friends we'd see every summer. It was really an idyllic summer existence. From the time I was 1 year old to the end of my 12th summer we were up there from late June till early September. It has ruined me forever for a normal, hot,...

So, where was I before my hard drive crashed and I lost perhaps hundreds of photos that I hadn't gotten around to backing up yet? Oh, yes, a dramatic change of heart. It was July 14th and I was at my friend Joy's house. I was discussing the two year ordeal I had been going through with Tim about having another baby - my 5th potentially. In short, I didn't want another baby. The adjustment to our 4th baby was rough on our marriage and my 4th baby was DIFFICULT in every possible way. I couldn't imagine a 5th baby. Fear was abounding in my heart. Joy broke through all of that and said,"The Bible does say to submit in this issue." Pause. "Really? You're right." And then Diane jumps in to wholly support Joy's declaration of truth. Tim wasn't asking me to do anything wrong, per se. I could trust God with this decision. It was a baby, after all. Not a move half across the world or some disease he was going to give me. So, 9 months and 2 day...

There have been a few times in my life when I have had a dramatic change of heart, or made a dramatic decision spontaneously. We'll start with the dramatic decision spontaneously made. Tim and I were together on a Saturday morning when we were dating and were intending on going to a Singles Meeting at church a little later on. All of the sudden Tim blurts out, "Let's get married today!" We had been dating for seven weeks (yes weeks , not months or even years). I look at him and say, "What?!" We had broached the topic several weeks earlier, but hadn't discussed it much since then. In fact, we had even "broken up" for several hours (yes, hours , not days, weeks or even months. Everything happened in warp speed time for us.) Well, he begged me to marry him. He told me some stories from the Bible to justify the crazy decision. We went to my Dad's house later that morning and Tim formally asked him for my hand in marriage. My Dad repli...

Where do I start? Happy Birthday Julia! You've been such a sweet, mild-mannered baby and I've loved watching you grow and learn how to roll, crawl, and attempt the first maneuvers for walking. You can crawl faster than any baby I've ever had! And you love to eat! When I put you on my lap to nurse you I notice you smack your lips and say "Na na na." You latch on eagerly and patiently keep sucking for several minutes (yes, I've got a very slow let down) till you start enjoying all the good stuff. You are delightful and I love your full, sweet, kissable lips. So precious. You also take great comfort in grabbing and sometimes pulling my hair - hard! Ouch! It seems to comfort you the most, until I'm wincing in pain and have to pry your fat little fingers from hair strands you've pulled out. Anyway, you are very sweet, easygoing, and happy with anybody. We haven't had any issues with separation anxiety, although your sisters report so much crying when I...